Happy belated Halloween!
It was quite a warm Halloween too, and if you’re in the “This is because it’s a climate crisis and we’re all gonna die” club, you can go ahead and cancel those plans to lie in the middle of the road during a Tour de France stage next year because the cycling industry is on the case:
So how will they do this? Well, the geniuses at Shift Cycling Culture have figured out that most of the emissions from making bikes come from…making the bikes:
Wow, you don’t say:
Until now I just assumed bikes fell from the sky. This changes everything! Fortunately I’m doing my part by riding a 26 year-old hunk of plastic:
I may have to deal with the humiliation, but at least I’m unencumbered by guilt.
Speaking of humiliation, the airbag bib short is one step closer to becoming a reality:
Until now you probably thought an “aerobag” was just a derogatory term for a douche on a TT bike, but it’s actually a system that turns you into human packing material:
So how does it work? Well, sensors or something, but you may also be able to activate the device yourself:
Yes, anybody who’s crashed a bike knows perfectly well how much time you have to manually deploy an airbag. Though I suppose it could come in handy during altercations:
The art of fighting without fighting pic.twitter.com/RJcULgV89s
— Crime Net (@TRIGGERHAPPYV1) October 30, 2024
Not only would it offer physical protection, but it would also make the cyclist appear larger in order to ward away predators. Simply deploy your aerObag and you’ll finally get those three feet you’ve been pleading for in vain:
Objects in the mirror may be more inflatable than they appear.