Popular culture rarely if ever gets cycling right, as some of our most insightful film critics have pointed out: However, last night I happened to be watching the new e-bike episode of "South Park," and was amused to note that they did an excellent job sending up the middle-aged Fred, or MAMIL, if you prefer:... Continue Reading →

I play a number of roles in life: father, husband, former semi-professional bike blogger turned gentleman wordsmith of leisure... They're all pretty important, too. But when it comes to sheer responsibility, none of them comes close to my official position as the Classic Cycle Old Crap Test Pilot. Alas, I am deeply ashamed to say... Continue Reading →

Not too long ago I gave this bike a tune-up: Which elicited the following comment: I don't know how you do it, but you've managed to take that beautiful Homer frame and build it with the scabbiest collection of parts bin detritus that it is so fugly it must be completely theft proof. To be... Continue Reading →

Further to yesterday's post about atonement, it included the following AI-generated image: . People find AI frightening and dystopian, but I think it would be a lot less intimidating if we simply referred to it as Fausse Intelligence. Though no matter what you call it this guy lurking in the crowd is going to haunt... Continue Reading →

Today is Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement, so consider this a non-post in observation of and deference to this holy occasion. [The Shofar can be slippery, so consider giving it the Rivendell treatment by wrapping yours in Newbaum's.] Unfortunately, being just an all-around exemplary person, I have little to nothing for which to atone.... Continue Reading →

As a former semi-professional bike blogger and current gentleman wordsmith, I understand that people turn to this particular bullshit depository for a host of reasons, and very near the bottom of that list is in-depth product reviews, though I will continue to update you on how I'm getting along with The World's Most Niche-iest* Shifter... Continue Reading →

Further to yesterday's post, the A. Homer Hilsen is now running beautifully--so beautifully that the very next morning I decided to commute to Brooklyn on it: As I've mentioned, I commute to and from Brooklyn twice a week. The distance is a bit under 20 miles each way, and it's an ideal bike commute in... Continue Reading →

With the Meh-roica bike now running smoothly... ...it was now time for me to turn my attention to the A. Honus Hildegaard: All of the above is true, especially the mac and cheese part, and it's for this reason that since taking delivery of it in March of 2020 it has become perhaps my most... Continue Reading →

I have dedicated my life to cycling. This is because there is so much that is wonderful about it: the joy...the freedom...the exhilaration... But what I love even more than any of those things is that it requires no personal growth from me whatsoever. See, in real life, no matter how obstinate you may be,... Continue Reading →

All this talk of Meh-roica bikes last week compelled me to head out on one this past Friday as soon as I concluded my broadcast day: This in turn finally compelled me to do a little more primping: After acquiring this bike very inexpensively last April, I pledged to spend absolutely no money on it,... Continue Reading →