Run Out Of Town On A Rail

Firstly, nobody asked me to do this, but I just happened to notice that Jones is having a sale:

Those look like some pretty good deals to me:

I don’t have a favorite bike. Actually, that’s not true, my favorite bike is usually the one I happen to be riding at the time. However, when it comes to bikes I’m grateful to own, the Jones is at or near the top of the list. Jeff Jones will tell you that his bikes are great at pretty much everything, and it’s true–his bikes really are great at pretty much everything, and I can’t think of too many others that are simultaneously so simple and so capable. Really, my only problem with the Jones is it taunts me with how capable it is, since I rarely have more than a few hours at a time to ride yet every time I’m on it I want to vanish into the wilderness for three days. Anyway, the point is, if you’ve been considering one this is probably a good time to go for it. Or not, it’s none of my business.

Speaking of limited riding time, due to the annual back-to-school, back-to-work monsoon week I’ve had even less than usual, and so I’ve been making early morning Lycra runs, which is the cycling equivalent of grabbing one of those breakfast bars as you’re running out the door instead of eating a proper meal:

That’s not to say I don’t enjoy a good early morning road ride, because I most certainly do–as a lapsed Fred and sub-mediocre Cat 3 it was a way of life for me for many years, and I can revert to it as necessary. At the same time, it is a much more transactional approach to cycling, and is less of an escape than it is just another facet of a busy day, like brewing coffee or generating TPS reports. I mean I’m so busy at the moment I don’t even have time to consume hard-hitting deep-dive cycling journalism like this:

I mean come on, that’s at most a 25-word story:

It’s a bag that goes on your handlebars. If you have stuff you want to carry on your handlebars then yes, you should use one.

Of course one of the best ways to integrate riding into a busy day is to commute by bike, which is what I usually do. However, after two weeks of riding a Jones on quiet garvel roads I admit I wasn’t dying to return to the urban scrum right away. Plus, it’s been hot as balls, and while I’ve been commuting by bike all summer, heat just feels different after Labor Day. Therefore, I figured I’d just ride early and then take the subway–a decision it didn’t take me too long to regret. Not only did I sweat on the platform just as much as I would have on the bike, but in the course of my morning subway ride I encountered nearly the full suite of straphanger indignities, including malfunctioning elevators and addled passengers who need to be removed from the train by the authorities. On the plus side, the train itself was air conditioned and I was able to read (at least when the addled passengers weren’t ranting), and I also didn’t have to deal with motor scooters in the bike lane–though I was lucky in that respect, because there’s no escape from those things, even underground:

If you want to see the gripping video, it is here:

Naturally the the incident went “viral,” and I guess people tried to blame Transportation Alternatives, which is a bit of a stretch:

I mean I don’t blame the American Egg Board when someone’s eating a smelly breakfast sandwich next to me:

Though when they’re pushing eggs as a “sweet summer treat” it’s hard not to be suspicious of their twisted agenda.

In any case, people apparently bring motorcycles onto the train often enough that it’s practically its own genre on the YouTubes:

And while it often feels like society really started to fall apart in New York City in 2020, the videos date all the way back to the salad days of five years ago:

Still, better a motorcycle on the train than a bicycle in the train tracks–which also happens:

Of course there’s no problem that can’t be solved with a stupid law, and so now there’s a bill in the city council to require people to register e-bikes with the Department of Transportation:

…as though any city agency has the manpower to start an e-bike registration scheme:

Good luck with that.

Powered by

Up ↑

%d bloggers like this: