Well the week has gotten away from me like a hub’s worth of ball bearings, though I did manage to get out on the Vengeance Bike today by way of preparing myself for complete and total Five Boro Bike Tour domination:
Here again is my weapon, set against the backdrop of the city it will soon be flattening like a
crabon advanced composite Godzilla:
In addition to having a pleasant ride quality and a striking appearance, the Vengeance Bike is particularly compelling in that it exists at the intersection of the traditional and the modern: the swoopy non-aero cables, threaded headset, and freewheel cluster are all the former; and the clipless pedals and monocoque
crabon advanced composite frame are decidedly the latter. Also, broadly speaking, we’re used to seeing components like these on thin-tubed metal bikes, not distended plastic ones, so it almost fools the eye into thinking it’s just a regular frame that’s been flattened into some sort of two-dimensional albino Gumby:
Note also that I’ve added a water bottle since I’m afraid of drinking from the ancient Campagnolo aero bottle yet I’m unwilling to remove it and sacrifice both the period-correct aesthetics and the potential aero gains. (I assume it acts as an airfoil, because Campagnolo would never design anything just for looks, that’s ridiculous to even contemplate.)
In any case, I’ll return next week to confirm that I did indeed win the ride, though you’ll probably see it in the New York Post before then:
FIVE BORO BIKE GORE
Cyclist impales self on shards of shattered vintage bicycle frame after unleashing mighty attack on Verrazzano Bridge.
Either that or I’ll get hopelessly tangled in my non-aero brake cables like a seagull in a six-pack holder:
I should probably bring some cable cutters.