Bigger Fish To Fry

Further to yesterday’s post, we got another fish yesterday!

My son hooked this one and even reeled it in through a bed of water lilies.

Clearly I need to equip my Rivendell with a wicker creel:

My transformation into a middle-aged artisanal fop is nearly complete–though this morning I did don the Lycra and set off some red light cameras:

Obviously I was kidding about the tickets:

But even so it looks like Pearl Izumi is good for it:

I’ll let them know I’m looking at $5,000 in total fines and that they can send the money to my attention. Then I’ll get a truly fop-tastic Platypus, complete with front and rear creels, and dub it “The Riv That Lycra Built.”

Speaking of Westchester (the county that Yonkers is in) and traffic enforcement, this past summer I mentioned that a legislator up there is trying to make a helme(n)t law(n) happen:

After firing off the tweet about the cameras I found myself wondering, “Hey, whatever happened with that helmet law?,” and eventually found this:

If the measure is enacted, Westchester would become one of the few jurisdictions in the state requiring helmets for riders of all ages. Rockland County and the town of Greenburgh are among the few that already adopted such measures.

Greenburgh Police Chief John Kapica said his town’s law is rarely enforced and is low priority among officers.
“It is ill-conceived,” Kapica said of the county’s proposal. “It sounds good, but it is very, very difficult for police departments to enforce. … I think it is a lot of baloney.”

I knew Rockland (or at least parts of Rockland) had some kind of helmet law but had no idea about the Town of Greenburgh. As it happens, not only is Greenburgh in Westchester, but it’s the place where I do much of my riding. So basically, I went from being annoyed that Westchester might have a helmet law because I often ride there, to learning that the part of Westchester where I usually ride already has one and nobody gives a shit about it, least of all the police. That’s quite an emotional roller coaster, and the lesson I choose to draw from it is that you can get upset about stuff if you want, but in the end apathy always wins.

Meanwhile, in New York City, we may be seeing lots of Pando Cyclists, but they’re being offset by lots of Pando Drivers:

Renting different types of cars gave me a chance to check them out. But owning one? With the worrisome dance of street parking and the nag of routine maintenance? I’d rather take the subway. Who wants to add to global warming anyway?

But urban life now is upside down. The subways, buses and ride-sharing platforms offer trips that aren’t for the nervous, and car-sharing services aren’t practical or economical for long-term rentals.

If you’re still nervous about taking the subway you need a Xanax, not a car. Nevertheless, despite being in his prime Rivendell years and not wanting to deal with the burden of motor vehicle ownership, this particular person doesn’t appear to have considered the humble bicycle and has instead decided, “Fuck it, I’m leasing a Hyundai.” (Or a Mazda, as the case may be.)

Now, as someone who owns a motor vehicle in New York City myself, I have no moral authority to pass judgment on my fellow New Yorkers who also choose to drive. If you want a car, you can afford a car, and you’re prepared to operate it responsibly, then by all means go see your tri-state dealer. Still, if you’re spending four fucking hours looking for parking then it might be time to at least question your decision:

Finding a parking spot these days less than four blocks from home is worthy of a Tiger Woods-style fist-pump after he sinks a birdie. I belong now to a tribe of people who prize their secret spots and talk strategy for hours. Even with all the tips, though, I recently spent four hours searching for a suitable spot and had turned scarlet red in a toddler’s temper tantrum when I gave up (my wife found a spot in 15 minutes).

Alas, of the many types of New York City Pando Drivers, I suspect this one falls under the “Has subconsciously decided to move to the suburbs but just doesn’t realize it yet” category, which comprises a significant percentage of the Pando Driver total:

But I am betting on the future — or at least hoping to outdrive it. I have freedom, but it is limited (see parking, above). No wonder many have chosen to flee to the suburbs, where cars are king and parking in front of your house is a God-given right.

Hey, I hear Westchester’s pretty nice…

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