Well, another weekend has come and gone and I’ve once again failed to get caught up on the Tour de France–though I did briefly watch the NBC Sports commentary team talking about the most recent stage after it had finished, and I’m clearly missing an exciting race:
Actually I don’t have FOMO so much as I have RTMO, which is “Resignation To Missing Out:”
Hey, what do you want from me? I’d like to watch the three-week bicycle race that takes place for hours at a time every single day, but I’ve been busy. For one thing, I’m currently attempting to parse all the log-ins and schedules concomitant to the “reopening” (LOL) of the NYC school system. Right now as far as I understand it my children will be attending school for in-person instruction every third Wednesday, but on prime number dates only, barring Jewish holidays of course. Clearly this is a cunning attempt to confuse and outwit the virus:
And presumably the resulting parental bafflement is merely collateral damage. Then there’s that lengthy school supply list, which requires a cross-town scavenger hunt even on a normal year. Fulfilling this years’ list was even more difficult, and I’ve gotta say including “A safe and effective COVID-19 vaccine” on there along with the #2 pencils and marble notebooks seems a bit unfair. (Not only that, but it also says, “Bring enough to share with the class!”) Maybe they figure some kid’s parent is a brilliant scientist and they’ll get lucky. I’m pretty sure that’s how they cured Polio.
Not only that, but I’ve also got to find time to ride my bike amid all this mishegas. Rest assured I’m doing my best on that front; for one thing, I’m trying to avoid Twitter so I don’t get sucked into the latest national news stories:
Hey, the voters deserve to know where the candidates stand on DMT and saunas.
Then there are local matters, such as the latest developments in our wonderful gutter-dining program, designed specifically so people in wealthy neighborhoods can take pictures of their friends brunching and compose social media posts about how New York City is not dead:
Add “The restaurant came out of nowhere!” to the list of credible driver excuses for crashing into stuff.
Maybe those “vehicular diners” are onto something:
Even then, I’ve been riding less than I’d like, though I did spot the A-Team van on my usual route this morning:
And while the Putnam Trail through Van Cortlandt Park remains resolutely closed, somebody has made a rather convenient hole in the fence:
Maybe they read my post from the other day.
Sometimes you’ve got to take matters into your own hands.