It’s mid-November, which means we’re already approaching the summit of 2024, before you know it we’ll collectively zip up our jerseys and descend into 2025.
In the meantime, I find myself looking over my shoulder at the year we’re leaving behind and the bikes that have carried me through it. So which of them would be the “Bike Of The Year?” Where would I even begin? In search of a rubric, I turned to the mainstream cycling media:
Here are the best road bikes in various categories, though as you can see they’re all pretty much the same bike:
But wait, there’s more!
That is some finely-sliced categorization:
I wonder if one day someone will figure out how to make a road bike that combines most of the above attributes–you know, one climbs well and sprints well and is made of metal and is also comfortable over longer distances.
Nah, it’ll never happen.
Oh, wait, sorry, I left out more road bike categories:
“Best performance road?” Is performance not a reasonable expectation with the others? And why does “Italian” get its own category? It’s 2024! Apart from the names, there is nothing inherently special about Italian road bikes anymore. To paraphrase the Four Questions, why is an Italian bike different from all other bikes? Consider Bianchi, which in 2024 is really nothing more than a color:
And what about gravel bikes?
At least there’s not a category for “Best Italian Gravel bike.”
Oh, wait, yes there is:
“I’m in the market for an Italian gravel bike” is a phrase you hear only slightly more often than “I’m looking for a Saudi Arabian microbrew.” And when the hell did cyclocross get folded into gravel?!? That’s just insulting. Cyclocross bikes are the entire reason gravel bikes exist. People sometimes say that gravel bikes are just ’90s mountain bikes, but they’re really just cyclocross bikes that got dumbed down with disc brakes. But now of course the cyclocross bikes have disc brakes too, so it’s all basically meaningless.
And I’m not even going to address mountain bikes, because I don’t consider those bikes anymore:
I’m sorry, where’s the “normal bike without a bunch of shit on it” category? This is just depressing. If you’re going to divide mountain bikes into eleven (!) different categories (yes, eleven, one of them got cut off in the screenshot) and you’re not going include a Jones in any one of them, then I have no choice but to completely disregard the entire enterprise.
As for BSNYC/RTMS/Tan Tenovo Enterprises, Ltd. Bike of the Year for 2024, at this point I’d narrow it down to three finalists. I’m not saying they’re the “best,” but they are the bikes that have most captured my imagination and riding time over the past year. (They’re also the bikes that have come to me most recently, which may have something to do with it.) Here they are:
Best Road Bike That’s Also a Gravel Bike That’s A Singlespeed But You Can Also Set It Up As A Double Or A Triple And Also It’s Really Comfortable And It’s Steel And It Has Lugs
I’m certainly not saying you have to be old to love this bike, but I am saying this is the perfect bike for the aging singlespeeder. Sure, I suppose putting a triple crank on your singlespeed is a little like putting a bunch of handrails in the bathroom. But what’s cooler? Maintaining those “clean lines?” Or being able to get off the toilet?
Best Over-The-Top Early 21th Century Road Bike From A “Boutique” Brand That’s Really Just Another Bike From A Huge Bike Company
While I embrace and espouse the classic steel ethos, as a recovering roadie of a certain age, there’s an undeniable pleasure in riding the exotic bikes that were well beyond your reach when you were in your “prime.” It feels like I’ve finally arrived–20 years later, and at a place where nobody else wants to be anymore, but better late than never, right?
Best Bike I Always Dismissed As A Rolling Joke But Is Actually Surprisingly Fun And Interesting
I’m still waiting for Outside to publish my latest column in which I share what I learned from one of the Trek engineers who designed this thing. (I really should start a blog where I can publish stuff whenever I want.) But what I will say about the Y-Ferl is that, while superficially it’s the antithesis of everything I stand for, it is also one of the few bikes that takes true advantage of The Crabon, and for that it has earned my respect. The LeMond is half-crabon, but apart from being a little lighter and looking cool (if you’re into that sort of thing) there’s really no reason for the crabon–or even the titanium for that matter, and I suspect I’d enjoy riding one of its steel contemporaries just as much. The Y-Foil however uses crabon to create a truly unique frame that would be more or less impossible in any other material and nets the rider not only aero benefits but a subtle suspension effect that I must admit is rather enchanting. Of course you can get much the same effect from a pair of higher-volume tires, and these days I don’t ride nearly fast enough to realize any of the aero benefits, but in the context of a late-90s race bike I give Trek credit for pulling off what it set out to do, and it’s a fun bike to ride just as long as you’re prepared to accept the ability to carry only one water bottle, as well as the fact that if it’s even a little wet out that water bottle will be absolutely covered in road grit due to the lack of a seat tube.
So which will win? I dunno, but I’m going to head out for a ride on one of them now, which will hopefully bring me closer to a final decision.